“This is one of the greatest advances in the history of internet,” said Stephen Prashner, the newly-appointed head of the Google TiSP division. “Our services will bring a free, high-speed internet to literally everyone with a toilet in their homes.”

Although TiSP has been met with some skepticism, the idea of a widely-available free broadband internet has crashed several ISP’s stocks, most notably Comcast. Comcast stocks, which were selling for about $15 a stock, has crashed to the value it deserves, namely about $0.15 per stock.

Google is no newcomer to crashing other companies’ stocks. Earlier this year, with the launch of Android 2.0 and its free turn-by-turn navigation system, Google made a significant dent to Garmin and TomTom’s stocks.

It will be interesting to see what other kinds of smelly but free ideas Google will be able to cook up in their fortress in Mountain View, California.

In other news, plumbers around the U.S. are worried that they will now have to learn skill in broadband installation following the announcement of the Google TiSP division.

“You know this was a bullsh*t award,” said Kanye to The Paprikka, “Just like Taylor winning that award was bullsh*t. When I think something is bullsh*t, I tell everyone what I exactly think: that it’s bullsh*t!”

Kanye later apologized for using bullsh*t so many times and not using any rhymes in our interview.

Kanye also was grancious enough to share with us the exact wording of his outburst in Oslo.

“Yeah, yeah, I’m gonna go up and be like ‘Yo! Obama, I’m happy for you, and Ima let you finish, but Yasser Arafat has the most bullsh*t Peace Prize of the century,’ and all the people are gonna be like ‘sheeeet did he just say that?’” said Kanye.

Following this announcement, the officials in Oslo are preparing for the worst.

“We are getting ready for anything,” said an official in the town hall, asking to be anonymous. “I mean, President Obama could start crying, right there! Or, someone could throw a shoe at Kanye, just like what the Iraqi journalist did to President Bush, and miss and hit President Obama! We must be ready for everything.”

As tension rises, the world awaits to see what will happen on this faithful day.

In other news, Kanye West has reportedly decided to go spend a month in India to meditate and become a calmer person.

Disclaimer: The above post does not necessarily reflect the author’s views. The author does not think the award was bullsh*t (although maybe premature), and would like to extend his congratulations to President Obama.